The Felixes

Or, the Anti-Oscars.TM

Original Screenplay 2002

Y Tu Mama Tambien, Carlos Cuaron and Alfonso Cuaron

PRO: We liked this story of a sexy stranger who takes teenage boys to beautiful beaches and seduces them.

CON: There was a screenplay?

Far From Heaven, Todd Haines

PRO: Trent Lott tells Black Entertainment Television, "If Moore and Haysbert had gotten together, we wouldn't have all these problems today."

CON: Portrait of complacent, intolerant suburban America may strike Academy voters as too unreal.

Gangs of New York, Jay Cocks

PRO: It's never easy to pull off a lengthy epic struggle drenched with greed, jealousy and infighting and then someone had to write the screenplay.

CON: Among the rival gangs of screenwriters (Cocks, Lonergan, Zallian, Scorsese) someone deserves the nickname "the Butcher"

My Big Fat Greek Wedding, Nia Vardalos

PRO: Omission of laugh track a wise move.

CON: Omission of laugh track only thing distinguishing movie from episode of "Ouzo the Boss" or "Suddenly Souvlaki."

Talk to Her, Pedro Almodovar

PRO: Takes guts to write stage direction: "Benigno climbs inside gigantic vagina."

CON: Takes more guts to sit through scene described by stage direction: "Benigno climbs inside gigantic vagina."

Adapted Screenplay 2002

About a Boy, Peter Hedges, Chris Weitz & Paul Weitz

PRO: Points for originality: Toni Colette weeps uncontrollably and attempts suicide, but does NOT kiss Julianne Moore.

CON: Cheesy "I Will Survive" finale worthy of, well, a junior high school talent show.

Adaptation, Charlie and Donald Kaufman

PRO: Gives new hope to narcissistic screenwriters whose idea of moving beyond own experience is to write about their brother.

CON: That writer's block theme is so . . . we don't know . . . umm . . .

Chicago, Bill Condon

PRO: Updates a character named Mary Sunshine without making her a drag queen.

CON: Couldn't Catherine "$1.6 million is not much money to us" Zeta-Jones' snitty remarks have been improv?

The Hours,David Hare

PRO:Hare modifies Cunningham modifies Woolf; now THAT's an Adaptation.

CON: Alison Janney's "happy" character seems underwritten; why does she never burst in tears, throw out food?

The Pianist,Ronald Harwood

PRO: By narrowing scope of Holocaust to one man's experience, makes the horror of the Shoah small and comprehensible.

CON: Must have written "Szpilman, you idiot, you're lucky to be alive," 700 times.

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Felixes 2002 Table of Contents

Best Picture | Best Actor | Best Actress | Best Supporting Actor | Best Supporting Actress

Best Director | Best Foreign Film | Original Screenplay | Adapted Screenplay

Original Song | Original Dramatic Score

Cinematography | Art Direction/Set Decoration | Editing | Documentary Feature


Everything Else


Links | Credits
2003 Table of Contents | 2001 Archives | 2000 Archives | 1999 Archives | 1998 Archives

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